gloomy Friday

nothing special happened only going to bike shop and buy pump.
Pandora Box is so cold as always that freezes my mind...
brrr...

it is funny how I want to experience snow this year, on the other hand, I always get cold all the time. Contrast....
During my last stay in Pandora Box, I love winter a lot. it is more than romantic. and all the trees teach me how to survive.

my campus... I love it

the building on the left will be my campus... the place I will spend most of time here in this city. it is now under construction, but yeah overall I love the campus area...
My favorite place so far is.. the university campus... it is amazing! really amazing. I already told you that it is all black with red furniture...


well,
after meeting the HR department, I went to winkelcentrum to buy some detergent and toilet paper.... and I have 2stucks holland haring uuuuuuw... yummy.... also.. back to the old days of eating hema soft ijs mmmm.......




do not ask me how does it taste! it tastes damn good! I love haring so much... I can eat the whole bakje if you wish ahahahaha...

Day 3 in Pandora Box

I arrived in Pandora Box on Monday 23th of November, with a lot of hope and expectation.. A PhD, yes, I already sacrifices my comfort zone as a government employer and went this far away... for a "Dr" in front of my name.. no... the point is not that simple matter...

okay, jumping to the next absurd part. Garuda Indonesia direct JKT-AMS, I give 9 out of 10.. for the flight.. well, the seat next to me was empty (wohoooo) so I got extra space to lay my body down.. fufufu...

Schipol day 1... brought all the memories back. I still remember the first time I came to this place. I have a little crazy selfie habit ... with couple of friends of course. and I still remember the time I had to leave this place in 2014! I CRIED so bad.. and now,, I start my journey alone! it means that less selfie picture... (so far I only took one shoe-selfie picture)...


well...
Day 2,


I visited the immigration department at the University... Oh my God, the one in charge is really HELPFUL thanks God....! she is so nice.... answer all my stupid questions... and it makes me feel so comfortable.. really.....
I had to go to IND to got my Residence Permit, and register to the city hall... anyway...




Day 3, which is today.. (I supposed talk more on this part because it is the tittle)
In the morning I went to the city Hall! they have new building next to the central station, which is so nice,, and I do not know, artistic? I took my TBC test today. put my top clothes off got an x-ray, and she (the one in charge) said that if something is wrong, they will let me know less than 14 days.
After that I went home, cooked cordon blue for diner and at 2PM I went to the University (more than excited really)
I walked around the campus, with my co-promotor.... Oh My.... he is really........... nice............he shows me som interesting spots at the campus, and I do think that I really loves my new campus... especially the library.. I believe that it is bigger than my previous university's library. it is coloured black all the way with the red furniture! no way! those two are my favorite colour. I will post the picture later on...
Then, he introduced me to the whole department. Of course it is hard to remember all of their names, but I will get used to and memorize them later on... (full of confidece).

Pandora Box. be nice please...

Second time going to Pandora Box..
I have a lot of thought on my head.
going around the world is no longer my priority

Tomorrow I will go there once more...
A lot of thought come into my silly mind.

Okay, I am 28, a single woman. What to expect? I do not know

My last visit to Pandora box, I think I am in love with someone..
He is ......... well, I should not speak his name!
At that time, I hoped that he will love me back, but he did not
This is not my first time of course, being rejected by the one I adore.... It must be a hundred times for me...
Then, I was going home empty handed.

Then, I will go again tomorrow.
I do not know what to expect really...

ngomong-ngomong saya galau berat malam ini, setelah sholat isya, saya merasa galau... meninggalkan keluarga selama 4 tahun, Ya Allah... Aku mohon, lancarkanlah.. hanya kepadamulah tempatku berlindung.. dari seluruh marabahaya, hal-hal yang buruk dan kesesatan..

Tinggal di Pandora Box sebagai minoritas muslim pasti terasa berat. Pertama kali di sana, saya agak-agak limbung,,, tidak mendengar adzan, gak bisa sembarangan beli chicken wings di AHA, hiks, padahal chicken wings nya menggoda iman. Tapi...
seumur hidup, I found my Islam there.. saya menjadi lebih berpasrah pada Allah tentang arti hidup dan semakin percaya bahwa Dia lah penolong satu-satunya.

Pandora Box.....
di sana saya belajar bahwa Allah sungguh baik pada saya.... memberi saya kesempatan melihat dunia.... dan bertasbih mengagumi kekuatannya...
Allah....

I have a very wonderful team at work

I feel blessed, I mean how many people have a very convenient working environment. Then, I feel more than lucky to have one.

on This team, those people.....are Like a family at work, and I am, the youngest (not literally the youngest one, but I like to act childish sometimes, and claim myself as the youngest) of this family really grateful to be a part of this team.

actually I hate to say goodbye, so Instead of saying goodbye, I prefer told them see you agaaaaain....

 I will start my life as a PhD student on Monday.. I do not know what to expect, even the more rhetoric question, I do not know what my promoter expected from me..... I wish, I wish I will meet their requirement.
This is my ultimate goal in my Academic life...
I started this day calling my beloved uncle (Omde), I said "thank you" on phone, and started to cry when trying to do some flashback to the time I wanted to give up my academic dream. Omde was the only one at that moment talked to me wisely, he told me to keep on dreaming and continue my study.
Bringing the memory back, My father had an accident, he had to go through the darkest moment of his life, threatened to be paralyzed.... Since I am the eldest, people surrounds me told me to stop my Bachelor, and go back home and become the backbone of my family......

I was frustrated,  and omde calmed me down...... and he said, my extended family will pay for my tuition fee...
what happened next was...... I had a part time job to continue living...... I do not have to worry about tuition but....

Anyway,,,





During that hard time, I only have Allah, and support from my family, Mom, Dad, youngest brother,
I want to cry whenever I remember that Allah is always there... besides me.....
And on Monday I will go to Pandora Box,,, alone,,, and again, I believe that Allah will be there beside me.... Bismillah


the last picture, spoiler, ,,,,,,,....

lucunya aku.. jatuh cinta pada tangan itu

mungkin kalian akan tertawa membaca postingan ini, tapi... ya aku jatuh cinta pada tangan itu..

sebagai seorang yang suka dengan seni, saya terobsesi dengan sketsa, gambar dua dimensi... saya tergila-gila ingin bisa menuangkan semua yang saya lihat ke dalam kertas dalam bentuk gambar, lukisan ataupun sketsa...

saya suka sekali dengan gambar gesture, dan... tangannya.. salah satunya
saya terobsesi melukis tangannya.. tangan dia,,,,

Saya tidak tahu mengapa,, tapi.. saya sungguh terobsesi, jatuh cinta mungkin.
Baiklah.. semakin ke bawah postingan saya semakin tidak logis.... mungkin ini adalah kali pertama saya jatuh cinta pada hal absurd luar biasa.. tetapi,...

apakah ini cinta??
seperti lagu-lagu cinta yang menggambarkan seseorang jatuh cinta pada mata seseorang... dari mata turun ke hati...

Dan ini bukan pertama kalinya saya jatuh cinta pada seseorang...
tapi..
saya jamin, ini adalah kesekian kalinya saya akan kecewa dan patah hati, beretepuk sebelah tangan sekali lagi......

well, malam ini ngepengin ngabsurd di blog..
lama yah gak posting, "one week before Pandora Box" jangan dihitung ya...
karena tadi siang habis minum obat batuk yang punya efek bikin kantuk.. ya jadi baper (bawa perasaan) makanya ada tulisan itu,

setelah tragedi Paris, saya jadi ngerasa deg-deg ser... takut pesawat saya jadi korban teroris, ya Allah lindungilah aku...

well, entah kenapa dulu waktu balik dari Pandora Box, lagi heboh pas MH17 ditembak di daerah Rusia.. sekarang teror Paris,, duh Pandora box, kenapa bermimpi tentangmu selalu susaaah dan menegangkan..

Kemudian tentang umur saya yang 28 tahun... pertama kali datang ke Pandora dua tahun lalu, saya bermimpi akan pulang bawa jodoh hahahaha... ternyata saya masih sendiri... kali kedua Pandora Box saya hanya berharap saya bisa bawa PhD degree dalam waktu kurang dari 3 tahun. terdengar ambisius, tapi tidak ada yang salah dengan mimpi yang besar, kan??

one week before pandora box

I feel so....

I do not know how I feel. Everything is kinda strange, one week to have a new life as a PhD student.
This is my ultimate dream, having the highest degree from one of top hundred university world-wide is too good to be true.

On the next week, I will face so many problem that maybe I cannot handle. But I am more than sure that... I have Allah. the God the almighty... who always be with me,,,, always...

a PhD...
I am more than ready...
busy packing... really busy